Michele Woodward

Powerful Coaching. Powerful Results.

career strategy

Do You Think Like An Hourly Employee?

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City commuters. Abstract blurred image of a city street scene.

 

It takes a lot to blow my mind. Really, a lot.

And recently I have, indeed, had my mind blown.

So let me tell you about it.

First, this thing kept coming up over and over again in my one-on-one coaching sessions. At first, just one person said it, then another, then three more and then – obviously, I’m lightning quick on the uptake – the shape of the thing became clear.

And I leaned back in my chair and said, “Wow.”

The realization is that some of us, even if we have a capital C in our title – CEO, COO, CFO – still see ourselves as hourly employees.

Especially if our parents were hourly employees. If our grandparents were hourly employees? Well, in that case, the mindset is often completely baked in.

So what, you ask? What’s wrong with hourly employment?

Nothing – I’ve had plenty of jobs that paid by the hour (Would You Like Fries With That?). There’s dignity, importance and purpose in working this way.

Though, sometimes, the clues we get working in hourly jobs are these:

  • The boss is the boss and I do what the boss tells me to do
  • I do my shift and that’s all I owe them
  • Work is drudgery and it’s impossible to get ahead
  • My schedule is not my own
  • I could be fired at any time for any reason so I better sit down, shut up and look busy

These clues add up to an attitude we take with us when we move into a salaried role. I’ve seen it so many times, manifested as:

  • Being fearful of (and overly deferential to) leadership
  • Not taking a stand or having an opinion
  • Working to the clock
  • Anxiety, depression and uncertainty

Other folks take it in a whole other direction. They make it:

  • “I’m being paid so much money – I have to give this job everything I’ve got!”
  • Fearful of losing the job they never believed they could have
  • Working with no boundaries
  • Anxious about having sole responsibility for decision-making
  • Impossible to have difficult conversations with subordinates
  • No or limited interests outside of work

Now, of course, this doesn’t affect every hourly employee who’s ever moved into a salary role and not everyone responds the same way.

But enough do that it warrants a little exploration, if you ask me.

Because I have seen people sabotage their careers because they haven’t been able to make the mental jump from “someone who does what other people tell them to do” to “I tell people what to do.”

They can’t seem to figure out how to move from “I am on a tightrope over a chasm of failure” to “Mistakes happen and my role makes it possible for me to learn and lead regardless.”

It’s a big leap from “I’m a cog in the machine” to “I run the machine.”

Most of us will work for years and years. My Social Security summary shows that I paid my first FICA tax in 1977 (from an hourly wage job!). Assuming that I continue working until I’m 70, that’s a work life spanning 53 years. Fifty-three years, darlings.

That is a long time to simply survive.

It’s enough time to realize that each of us what we learned in the past may have suited us in the past, but today is today. And it’s completely fair to consider: What works for me today?

Could it be appreciating an hourly past but living right now, in these circumstances?

Maybe it’s creating a life and a career that works not only for you but for the people you’re connected with – family, friends, colleagues and superiors alike.

I believe it’s also the satisfaction that comes from knowing, regardless of all the obstacles, that you’ve persevered and made a difference.

All of us owe it to ourselves to know where our feeling of limitation and anxiety is rooted and then pull up the roots and take a hard look.

If your ancient, inherited attitudes toward work are holding you back from being fulfilled and happy (which you can be even with work that’s challenging) then perhaps it’s time to toss those old roots onto the compost pile and start planting new seeds. And my hope is that they flower as a new way of being – and success – in your own +50 year work life.

 

 

 

One Fact And One Idea

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HarperThe CEO said to me last week: “If people are so unhappy, why don’t they leave?”

I shrugged. Because I don’t know why people stay in jobs that are wrong for them. In work environments that are toxic. In places they don’t grow.

(For that matter, I don’t know why people stay in neighborhoods they hate married to people they loathe driving a car that makes them crazy, either.)

I am here to tell you – in general, people tolerate way too much.

And it’s weird.

Maybe we tolerate way too much every single damn day because down deep we think we’re not powerful enough to change things.

Or we’re not sure we’re really so unhappy. We worry that maybe we’re misinterpreting things. Or maybe we’re the whining and complaining crybabies our big brothers always said we were.

And then there’s “this economy”, which always seems to be spoken of in an anchorman’s voice, like some gigantic warning of looming danger.

But maybe it’s really because we’re terrified of change. What if we do go through all the trouble to do something different and… it’s worse!

These are the big fears people share with me.

I’d like to give you one fact and one idea to consider if there’s something you’re putting up with day after grueling day, and can’t seem to find the heart to do anything about.

Fact: The economy has changed. Where in 2009, US unemployment stood at a staggering ten percent, it’s even more amazing that right now in my home state it’s at 4.5%.

That means now is the best time in years to find a new job.

(It also means that now is the best time in years to ask for a raise because brass will have to pay more to retain the best talent.)

(If they haven’t gotten this message yet, they will as soon as they can’t fill a key position.)

(Just sayin’.)

Now for that idea I was telling you about.

Idea: Professional baseball players suit up for a game in the uniform of the team they play for. Whether they’re a National or a Diamondback or a Mariner, they wear the colors and play for the team – knowing full well that even in the middle of the game they can get a call saying they’ve been traded to another team.

And the next day, even though it might be hard, they suit up in an entirely new uniform and play for the new team.

For these professionals, it’s less about the team and more about the position they play. They know they can – and will – be a great first baseman for any team.

This is what you need to understand. 

Rather than consider your employment as a lifetime commitment you cannot break, think about it as a baseball team. As long as you play for them, you’re going to hustle and do a good job. But you can – and will – do an equally good job for any other team.

Because you are a very good first baseman.

When you need a change, make a change.

There is no need to tolerate a sick workplace. There is no need to fear something new.

There is only opportunity in the economy right now.

It’s time to get in the game.

 

Believe Your Way Forward

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Slack line in the city park.

Time after time, a huge truth is revealed to me:

Whatever you believe becomes your reality.

About six months ago, a woman came to me for coaching. A Vice President in a Fortune 50 company, she was worried because someone was promoted over her.

Someone younger.

Someone male.

And, in her late 50s, she wondered if she was getting sent a message. Perhaps she was getting sunsetted. Maybe they were getting ready to let her go. Maybe this was her terminal job and she’d never ever get hired again.

After all, who hires someone who’s 57 years old?

As a result of these assumptions, she worked extremely hard and went above and beyond to deliver results. Early mornings, late evenings, travel, conference calls, meetings and paperwork. She did it all.

And it felt like no one noticed. And it was never enough.

When we first met, her stress level was through the roof. I mean, stratospheric.

I knew what she needed – she needed  to rebuild her confidence and develop a strategy to manage the worry. She also had to figure out what was true about her work situation.

Because what you believe becomes your reality.

And she surely believed things were pretty terrible.

Long story short, among the things we did was to create a strategy for her to become more visible – in the office and out of the office. So, when offered a speaking role at a big conference, she said yes.

No, wait a minute. She said, “Yes!!”

Afterwards, people gave her amazing feedback about her presentation and she felt really good about how the whole conference went.

Then, one day, her phone rang. It was the CEO of a boutique-y company that excels in her area of expertise. In fact, they are more highly regarded than her company in this particular area.

The CEO said, “I’ve had my eye on you. Will you come work for me?”

Would she? Let’s see – more money, better title, solid-line reporting to the CEO.

And suddenly the assumption that no one hires a 57-year old woman went out the door.

And a new truth was unveiled:

“I am appreciated for what I do.”

Which is something pretty wonderful to believe.

So let me ask you: What reality are you believing into existence?

 

The Moral Of The Story

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Inside a cardboard box concept for moving house, creativity or t

Let me tell you a story.

It’s a story about bravely facing fear – a big, lifetime kind of fear – and emerging stronger than you ever thought you could be.

Let me tell you a story about quitting a job.

Once upon a time, there was a woman who we’ll call Diane. For a long time, Diane had a dream – she wanted to have her own consulting and coaching business. She studied and learned and grew, but the reality of being a single mom and getting her kids launched weighed heavily on her mind. Money and security worries haunted her every moment.

So, like a lot of people, Diane put aside her dream in service to her family and their needs.

She commited to a corporate job with a big, international powerhouse.

Now, Diane was good at her corporate work and became a Vice President who consistently found herself at the ear of the CEO talking about strategy, vision and big picture issues. In response to one of the Big Vision Items, she developed a ground-breaking program that became widely implemented throughout the organization.

Diane routinely traveled the world from Asia to Europe. She was on so many conference calls that she almost forgot what it was like to meet with people face-to-face. Don’t even think about the quantity of email she managed.

Her pace was frenetic and challenging, but she was contributing, and excelling, and that felt very good.

And her children were becoming purposeful young adults and moving into their own lives, and that also felt very good.

She had a little nest egg, and that felt very good, too.

But then, suddenly, some things began to feel less good.

The CEO left and was replaced by someone who didn’t see Diane in the same light. She found herself shuffled around, and excluded, and reporting to someone she wasn’t so sure about.

It was confusing and unsettling.

Then one day her boss said that Diane would be let go at the end of the next quarter.

So Diane did what many of us in that situation would do – she worked like the devil to make sure no one would ever say that she left the place worse off than she found it.

A little voice began in her head – the little voice so many single moms hear, “What am I going to do about money? How can I ever replace my corporate salary in my own business?” – and Diane began to panic a little.

At the end of that quarter, Diane fully expected to be let go. She was prepared for it. Instead, her supervisor said, “Will you stay through the next quarter just so we can get everything really buttoned up?” And Diane, feeling the worry of pending financial doom, said “Sure!” and again worked like the devil to produce.

One quarter led to another with yet another extension, a flurry of production from Diane, more money into her savings, and a stressful future.

And then one day Diane took a deep breath. She stepped back. She got very still and reflected. She called a friend who asked:

What did she really want?

What was holding her back?

Was it true she didn’t have enough money to start her own business?

Was she going to wait any longer to do what she really wanted to do? Or was she going to allow the company to continue to string her along?

How long was she going to continue to jump to meet the demands of others?

How long was she willing to postpone her dream?

She sat down, right there, and composed her resignation letter. Because she’s who she is, she sent it to an employment lawyer friend who tweaked it and sent it back.

Diane submitted it.

She waited.

Until the HR head called to say, “We’re not accepting your resignation.”

What?

“I’ve never seen anything like it,” the HR woman said. “The conversations around this were so interesting.”

Diane felt herself getting mad.

Until the HR head said, “You see, you are so well-regarded and so appreciated around her that we’re not going to accept your resignation – we’re going to fire you and give you a severance package of six months of full pay plus your full bonus plus pay you for all of your unused vacation days.”

(That’s a big bonus and 270 unused vacation days, by the way.)

Diane laughed out loud. 

Her future now looked very different. Now, she could take the leap into self-employment without fear.

Now, she could finally live her dream.

It had only taken saying, “No. Enough. No more. Here is where I stop” to get exactly what she needed. 

And that, friends, is the moral of the story.

 

How Are You Connected…To Yourself?

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I invested some time watching an interesting video, and the further I got into the video the more I was sure you’d enjoy watching it, too.

It’s Oprah Winfrey at the Stanford Business School, talking about her career path and how she found her purpose and while it’s “classic Oprah” in tenor and tone, it’s something different, too. Maybe because she’s being interviewed by a student, maybe because the audience is mostly students, maybe because she’s in full mentor mode – regardless – Oprah is loose, comfortable and really giving of herself. Watch:

If you’re at a crossroads and can’t figure out where to go next, or what to do next – you will learn something by watching. My hunch is that you’ll get some insight about at least one thing you can do differently. Or do more of.

Because I most certainly did.

 

Tell Me, Who Are You?

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Horse & CarriageThey were at the absolute top of their game. Masters of their craft, they knew exactly what their customers needed.

They knew how different materials created different results, and worked tirelessly to turn out quality products.

They started as boys, became apprentices, and then were masters of their own shops. Esteemed and valued, they were absolute experts in their field.

And it was a field that was dying.

Because these were the buggy whip manufacturers of 1900.

Oh, they knew exactly how to make a whip for you if you had a pony cart. And what to make if you were driving a team of eight. They knew the perfect supple leathers to use, and how to make the best grip for any kind of weather.

They were amazing artisans.

But by about 1930, cars had overtaken the horse and buggy, and fewer and fewer people needed a whip to drive their non-existent team of horses.  In the span of a just few years, the centuries-old whip making industry was dead.

And many people were out of a job.

I’ll bet there were plenty of old whip makers who sat around on porches and complained that the world was a hard place, and lamented that a way of life was gone – a way of life that was good, honest and simple.

I’ll also bet that there were some buggy whip makers who saw the writing on the wall and became leather workers in another field. They fashioned belts or jackets. Or sofas.

Or maybe went outside their trade and became chauffeurs of new-fangled automobiles.

Or started a real estate business. Or went to school.

They acted.

It seems to me that there are always some people who take loss – expected or unexpected – as a catalyst to shape a new identity. They drop an old way of being and exchange it for a new way of living, seemingly taking it all in stride.

And then there are those who don’t.

Isn’t that fascinating? Someone was really great – at the top of their game – as a… travel agent. And rather than say, “I was a great travel agent, and I’m sure I’m going to be a great at something new”, they spend their energy wishing that the entire world would change and everyone would start using paper tickets again. Maybe someone felt so in the zone as a journalist, or a record label executive, or a book publisher – and then technology forever changed those fields.

It seems like some of us bang our heads against the wall desperately trying to find another job just like the one that will never, ever exist again.

Likewise, maybe we’re stuck because we got such comfort and sense of place being someone’s… spouse, child, grandchild, loved one.

Yet we spend our days honoring the gap in our lives rather than honoring the lives that were lived.

It’s important to grieve loss. In fact, it’s vital to your overall health and well-being – you have to understand what happened, and try to find a why…if there is a why to be found.

But it’s what you do when you find yourself in one of these change points makes all the difference.

You need to fashion a new story of who you are – a new identity – which honors the past but allows you to be fully present in the here and now.

To even get started, you have to be brave.

To take the first steps, simply embrace even the saddest loss as an opportunity to create a new identity. Draw strength from how great you were with the person or thing you loved, but move forward fully open to the idea that something new can be something good, too.

Or, alternatively, you can sit on the porch with your complaints and cling to the past.

The choice is entirely yours.

 

Can You Take A Compliment?

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Contrary to popular belief, it is entirely possible to be too self-deprecating.

It is extremely possible to be so very self-effacing that you wind up with no face left.

Teamwork

Maybe you think it’s charming or funny to say the equivalent of “oh, this old thing!” whenever anyone says anything nice about you, but it’s not. Not really.

Could be that when you feel uncomfortable with being in what you consider a power position you default to saying something like “you know, I’m making this up as fast as I can”, but – guess what? – despite your best intentions, you’re not creating a connection to other people with that sort of comment.

You’re just undermining yourself.

Because you know as well as I do that when you’re in the break room getting coffee and you say to the assembled throng of co-workers “I really have no idea what I’m doing”, that as soon as you walk out the door the chatter will be, “You know, she really shouldn’t be in that job – she doesn’t know what the hell she’s doing.”

So much for your idea that by running yourself down, you can blow down the barriers between yourself and others.

Self-deprecation is often deeply ingrained in our way of being. Probably it stems from the guidance we’ve received since we were able to process language – “remember, you’re no better than anyone else” and “don’t get too big for your britches” and, sometimes, “who do you think you are?”

We use self-deprecation to continue this relentless yet familiar drumbeat of messages. Because some of us have a secret worry that if we stand out too much, we’ll stand there all by ourselves. No one will invite us to sit with them at the lunch table, or any birthday parties, or to the sleepover on Saturday night.

Yes, oh, yes indeed, the workplace often dredges up all the fears of middle school.

And so some of us self-efface right down to the vanishing point – and the thing that vanishes is our ability to even (secretly, quietly) tell our own selves “well done”, let alone appropriately take credit for anything we accomplish.

Over time, that blindness to accomplishment really grinds you down. And makes you question… yourself, and whether you’re any good. Your judgment, and whether you’re smart at all. Other people, and who’s right. Then you question the entire world, and move right on to the galaxy.

Self-doubt becomes just that big.

So you’ve got to learn how to take a compliment. There’s an easy way to start – when the Big Kahuna says, “You handled that really well” take a deep breath and say:

“Thank you.”

Many leaders – especially new leaders – you know, the ones who went to a leadership training class one day in the Marriott’s Chesapeake breakout room (which happens to be the Platte breakout room in Nebraska, and the Dogwood breakout room in North Carolina, and the Pacific breakout room in California, just FYI) and did a worksheet and role-playing exercise called Always Give Credit To Your Team.

Hey, it’s always good to make sure your team gets credit – but not in a way that implies that you are unnecessary to the success of the group.

[Proving that you are in no way involved in your team’s success is not great career strategy, also FYI.]

So, instead of saying, “Oh, Big Kahuna, Jamie and Maggie really did all the work”, how about saying, “Thank you. I am really proud of the way the team came together on this. Particularly, Jamie and Maggie – they did a great job.”

Look what you just did there! You took credit and you gave credit – a nice balance which totally preserves your leadership position and shines a spotlight your hard-working people.

How freakin’ smart is that?!

And since you are so very smart, next time you edge toward your default position of using undermining self-effacing self-deprecation, stop right there.

Take a minute.

Think: could I just say “thank you” and hold onto my gorgeous, leadery, accomplished  face?

Oh, honey – I bet you can.

 

Random Thoughts #3

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Sometimes little thoughts flit through my mind, so I thought I’d share them with you…

A person who’s nice to the busboy is my favorite kind of person.

The older I get, the more I understand math and science. Such as: Task divided by Time plus Enjoyment = Fun.

Making new friends at any age is a joy.

Rediscovering old friends is a blessing.

Politics just get weirder and weirder.

Speaking of weird, the Pirates of the Caribbean movies have grossed $3.72 billion dollars. Now, there’s an idea for the federal budget deficit…

It’s only because of the past that we can see the future.

Sometimes the challenge is in making peace with what is realistically possible.

Technology allows me to have clients all over the world. I can visit the Philippines, Brussels, South Africa, Alaska all in one day. And still get to the grocery store.

I need a vacation.

To be financially secure, spend like someone who’s financially secure.

The phrase “in this economy” needs to be banned from use. Indefinitely.

This is a great article about negotiation.

We need to fully honor and acknowledge women heroes.

Little kids playing tee ball for the first time are the most inspiring athletes.

Couples who have been together 45 years and still hold hands inspire me.

There is profound wisdom in pop songs.

Today’s teenagers are more committed to change than we were at their age.

What goes around really does come around. So live your life accordingly.

The only thing I can truly control is my own energy and attitude toward the moment I find myself in.

Random thoughts are not that random after all.