Michele Woodward

Powerful Coaching. Powerful Results.

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The Thing About Culture

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People throw the word “culture” around like there’s a shared concept of what in the world they’re talking about.

“Culture”, for some, means for others to “do what you’re told.”

For snarky cynics, it means “what the website says and what no one actually does.”

For hopelessly optimistic folks, it means “that we’re all friends and we get along.”

Close, but no cigar, if you ask me.

Culture is, as I recently read, simply “The way we do things around here.”

How powerfully elegant is that?

The way we do things creates the culture in which we live and work.

So, if we want to change culture – we just change the way we do things.

Sounds easy, huh? But you know I like a process, so here goes:

First, we need to understand how it is we do things. This requires a little step back, and the detachment to catalogue our “how” without judgment.

How do we want people to spend their days? In back-to-back meetings? In the field? At their desks? On their feet?

What’s our paperwork flow like? What’s our approval process like?

How we spend our time reveals our true focus – so how does your organization (including your family) spend its time?

That’ll show you something really important.

Once we know how we do things, we need to ask the critical question: Who benefits from our culture?

If the only people benefitting are senior management, you’ve got a problem. Like, if senior leaders get their own suites at the Ritz Carlton while middle managers and others on the same trip have to double up at the Days Inn – what are you saying to your people? What are you creating?

If the only person benefitting is Carol in accounting whose fear of making a mistake means a ton of paperwork and molasses-like response time, you’ve got a problem. When you center your entire organization on the quirks and foibles of one personality – what are you telegraphing about what you value? About what’s important?

If the entire organization is centered around the CEO’s reluctance to have difficult conversations, you’ve got a problem. We’re talking about power grabs and petty tyrants and office politics and dysfunction kinds of problems.

And no one needs that nonsense.

If the only people benefitting are white men with a college degree, you have a very big problem. And I would argue that it’s time to move your organization beyond 1989 and firmly into 2019.

Just sayin’.

You have to be brave when you examine who benefits, because that person might be you. It’s entirely possible that the system is set up to mirror your strengths, values and priorities. Entirely possible.

But if you’re the only person benefitting, you owe it to your organization’s success to open it up. To allow more people the opportunity to grow and learn and thrive.

Creating a system which gives more people a chance to bring their knowledge and expertise to the table means building a culture that works.

Because any group makes better decisions with diverse voices and perspectives. You’ll also keep people on the team longer.

You’ll have more success.

The thing about culture is that it’s often created in a fractured set of vacuums – HR does things one way and Finance does something their way and Sales is a creature unto itself. All of this adds up to “the way we do things around here”.

And if the way we do things around here isn’t working, we have a responsibility to make it work. For everyone.

 

A Big Life

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One of the things I find intriguing in life is fame. So many pursue it, so few catch it. Fewer still hold onto it for a lifetime.

Maybe I’m sensitive to this subject because I live in Washington, DC, a town filled with “formers”. Or maybe it’s because the coaching profession has a small but ardent crowd who are convinced that fame is the only litmus test for success.

I don’t know, but I’m trying to understand. What’s the difference between living a Big Life and living a Small Life?

On Friday night I watched a concert by someone who’s had fame – the big, glitzy, lifetime sort of fame so many seek – Rosanne Cash. Born the eldest child of legend Johnny Cash, her life has been full of both opportunities and gawkers.

When she began singing and writing songs in her teen years, she started getting acclaim herself. Forty-plus years later, she’s been nominated for 15 Grammys and remains a recording and touring artist. She’s a genius.

As I listened to her play the other night, it occurred to me that this was a woman who’d had hit after hit after hit in the 1980s. You couldn’t turn on the radio and not hear “Seven Year Ache” or “Never Be You” or “I Don’t Know Why You Don’t Want Me”. She released ground-breaking albums and collaborated with the biggest names in music.

Now, however, you’re not likely to hear her songs anywhere on the radio.

(And that’s not just because country music has a thing about women artists.)

I wondered about that. I wondered what that would feel like to not have your music on the radio.

I wondered how Rosanne feels about fame.

On Saturday morning, it hit me. I think she’s sort of transcended fame. I mean, she’s had it and I imagine there were parts which were nice, and she’s still famous to a degree, but what Rosanne Cash is here to do now is to express herself.

Regardless.

Because she has something to say.

There are things she needs to create.

And she’ll do it whether or not she’s on top of the charts, on the radio or filling football stadiums.

Expressing herself is enough. Creating is enough. Being in that artistic moment is enough.

Whatever comes after that is fine.

And so, I realize, it has to be for me. As ong as I’m expressing myself, committed to creating things that matter to me, being the kind of person I aim to be – then life will be right-sized.

Fame, no fame. Big, small. Won’t matter. What will matter is the way in which I say – the way in which you say – what we’re here to say in the time we have left.

It’s really all that matters.

 

(photo courtesy: RosanneCash.com)

I Was Just Going To Ask You The Same Question

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You probably know that I’m not about making New Year’s Resolutions. They can be forced and unsticky and, therefore, fall by the wayside before February even starts.

I am, as you also probably know, more of a planner. So last week I sat myself down with my Personal Planning Tool – yes, I created it and I actually use it! – and the stuff that came up for me was really helpful.

The Tool is designed to get to a few action steps which you can easily do. For me, they were :

  • Look at client list for 2018 and chronicle successes
  • Create a spreadsheet tracking business revenues for the last four years
  • Create a revenue forecast for the first six months of 2019
  • Create three workouts I can use at the gym; schedule gym time

I’m proud to say that I knocked these things out in the lull week between holidays and I’m feeling rather smug about myself.

The Tool also gave me the ability to clearly see my priorities for 2019, and that’s where you come in. It’s clear that I want to step it up in the coming year. I want to be in the position a year from now to say that my work made a difference. So let me tell you about what I have planned.

I have executive coaching programs for individuals as well as organizations. One of the happiest things I’ve done in my coaching career is to partner with organizationswho want to really support their leaders. I coach people, facilitate learning and change – and it’s the thing I love doing.

With individuals, you can work with me in three, six or twelve month programs. I have space for one person in my unlimited coaching program, so let me know if that person is you.

In 2018, folks in my unlimited program negotiated better deals, dealt with office politics and stress, learned new skills and basically had more fun in their work. It was also pretty fulfilling for me to fully partner with them and not worry how many hours we were using.

That was wonderful. I love these people and look forward to working with them again in 2019.

My lower-cost program, The Club, is terrific but full at the moment. You can email to get on the waiting list if you’d like.

I have some groups this year, too. For men, I’m doing a new program this year. Did you know that the number one thing which gets people promoted and creates more success is social/emotional intelligence? I work with a lot of men clients and this is an area which – once guys get a sense of the rules and how it all works – gets results quickly. You can find more information here: Emotional Intelligence for Men

For coaches, I have my Circle of 12 mentored mastermind program starting up on January 8th. There are eleven people committed, so if you’re looking for a close community of like-minded peers who have good practices that need to move to great practices – think about joining us.

Also for coaches, I have my Executive Coach Mentoring program beginning in March. This one is designed for people focusing on working with organizational clients. We’ll learn about best practices, client acquisition and tools to support your business. It’s great, if I do say so myself.

And, for coaches who are on Facebook, I continue to moderate The Business of Coaching group which has been serving the coaching community since 2012. We have 1200 coaches from all around the world who participate in thoughtful and supportive conversations about our work. If you’d like to join this “secret group”, please let me know.

Finally, I recently was on a panel with an executive recruiter and an executive communicator, talking with a group about personal branding, career progression, leadership, mentoring, speaking and a host of other matters. We took questions, so, believe me – we ran the gamut! It was a delight, and I am looking forward to working with these two in other venues. Maybe your venue?

So, yeah, maybe this year will be ambitious. But I am planning for it to be the right kind of hustle – you know what I mean. Engaging, fun, feeding my curiosity, connected and connecting. I get sort of giddy thinking about it.

How about you? What’s on your dancecard for the coming year? Where are you going to have the impact only you can have?

I am all ears, sugar. 

Who’d Like A Little Homework?

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It’s that time of year. That time when we draw one year to a close and prepare for a new one.

I don’t know about you but sometimes I get to December 10th and ask myself whether I accomplished anything at all in the entire year. I’m so focused on the here and now that I’ve forgotten what, oh, February of last year was really like. (I think it was cold. And I think I got my knee replaced…?) But real accomplishments? They are all distant, fuzzy memories at best.

Have you ever noticed that we tend to discount the things that come easiest to us? As if some measure of struggle is required to make anything we’ve done “worth it”.

Last week I did a little exercise with myself and I invite you to join me in this wee bit of homework –  just 10 steps – because once I completed this process myself, I felt a lot more accomplished. And also rather awesome, in a total Ron Burgundy kinda way.

Step 1: Grab yourself some paper and a pencil. Or pen. Or colorful marker. Really, don’t get hung up on what you’re writing with. It’s a distraction. What was I saying? Oh, yeah…

Step 2: Optional beverage of your choice.

Step 3: Flip your calendar to January 1, 2018.

NOTE: “Flip” may be a euphemism for clicking on a back arrow until you get to January 2018. Access your calendar however you keep a calendar. And if you don’t keep a calendar, then you have no homework. Have a lovely day!

Step 4: Look at that first week of January, 2018. Anything interesting or unusual? Stuff you forgot? Stuff you forgot you accomplished? Write it down on your paper.

Step 5: Go through every week of the year and make notes.

Step 6: Look at your paper. You got more done than you thought you did, right? Go ahead, say it: “Wow! Look at me!”

Step 7: Replenish your beverage.

Step 8: Look again at your paper. Look at all those things you got done. Now, ask yourself a question:

“What do those accomplishments say about my goals for 2018?”

(I never said this homework was going to be an easy A, y’all.)

Step 9: If you set goals before 2018 started, compare your actual results to the goals you set out to achieve. How did you do? If you had no goals for 2018, it’s likely that some sneaked up on their own when you take a look at your accomplishments. Capture those, and be amazed at the ability of your subconscious to make things happen on your behalf.

Step 10: Now, knowing what you know about 2018, what do you want to do more of in 2019? What do you want to never do again? What do you want more than anything? What’s your dream? What would feel great to accomplish in the coming months? Write that down. Then make a promise to yourself to do one thing each week in 2019 to make that thing happen.

Easy.

Bonus Question: If you fell short or didn’t accomplish what you wanted to accomplish in 2018, what’s one small action you can do today to at least get momentum going in your favor? Even an  eensy-weensy step in the right direction still gets you headed in the right direction. And if you actually accomplished what you set out to do in 2018 (virtual pat on the back to you!), how could you amplify that thing for the coming year? Or build on it? Or solidify it?

Or maybe choose something wholly new? Think about the possibilities!

You have this one life, this one moment in time. Don’t wait. Don’t put off your hopes and dreams and fondest desires.

You have the power to make things happen. You’ve done it, and you’re going to do it.

And it’s going to be so gratifying when you get to December 10, 2019, do this exercise again, and say to yourself, “Wow! Look at me!” because you moved – maybe slowly, sure, but you moved – closer and closer to the thing you’ve always wanted to do.

Maybe You’re An Anxious Striver

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Years ago I learned something from my friend Jen Louden. It’s her idea of “Conditions of Enoughness”. Basically, it’s deciding before you set out to do anything what “enough” will feel like, so you know when you’re done.

I thought of this brilliant concept recently when hearing people talk about their drive for constant improvement. It occurred to me that constant improvement could actually be a bad thing.

Like, how you remove minute parts of a knife everytime you sharpen it. And, if you persist in sharpening the edge, at some point the knife loses its structural integrity and becomes a wisp of a thing rather than the sharp thing it once was.

I was reflecting on people who are what I call “anxious strivers”. The kinds of folks who are driven to go-go-go and do-do-do. Who only eat foods which have a point – their diet exists merely to provide protein, minerals, and “good fats”. They only read books which will improve their lives. Every spare minute is devoted to Doing Something In Service To Something Else.

Joy has very little role in their lives.

I have to ask, though: When you live in pursuit of constant improvement, when do you know how to stop? When do you know what enough is like? Because of the relentless “constant” in “constant improvement”, are you putting yourself on a hamster wheel that never stops and calling it exemplary performance?

Perhaps then, rather than constant improvement, we need to think about simply having clear goals and working to meet them. In that context, the questions become more like: How did I do yesterday? Do I need to do something differently than yesterday to reach my goal? Is it enough to keep doing what I’m doing and stay on this path I’ve set? Does this feel like enough yet?

That’s not to say stop learning. To stop incorporating your learning into your actions. I would never say that, because I’m a learner through and through.

I am suggesting that anxious striving, never knowing what enoughness looks like, never doing something just for the fun of it, sharpening your edge until you have nothing left… this is the recipe for burnout and unhappiness and, oddly enough, ultimately leads to a lack of real, meaningful progress.

When Office Politics Get Out Of Hand

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When I started as an executive coach, I never guessed I would have a specialty in helping people handle complicated office politics.

But I sure do. In fact, it’s probably the number one problem my clients face.

In 2014 I was asked to do a webinar with the Harvard Business Review Online on Bullies, Jerks, and Other Annoyances. It was, at the time, the most popular webinar on their platform.

Which is awesome and awful at the same time.

When I work with people facing toxic workplaces, there are a few things I ask them to consider.

Is it me? You really need to know yourself. Are you highly sensitive? Take everything personally? Then perhaps a little detachment might give you some relief. It’s counter-intuitive, but sometimes caring less allows you to perform at a higher level.

When you ask, Is it me? you need to look hard at the role in the whole mess which you may be playing. For instance, from time to time folks tell me that they simply have very high standards which no one else can seem to meet. Huh. Really? So interesting.

Because sometimes “high standards” are really “impossible to meet standards”. So why have them? Let’s see… so you don’t have to really cooperate, so you can take all the credit, so your ego soars. If that’s you, you are adding to the toxicity and it’s on you. To change the situation, you need to first change yourself – toward the good.

When you ask Is it me?, you can also explore places where you might have a simple misunderstanding which gets amplified. Like, for instance, a recent situation a client faced with a bossy, imperious peer who it appeared was overstepping boundaries of authority by gigantic leaps. Only by having a brave conversation did my client uncover that her office enemy actually had been promised a promotion which had been postponed… year after year. Once my client realized the injustice done to her enemy, the relationship turned into an alliance.

No enemy, no stress. Win-win.

If you take a hard look at yourself first and figure out that you’ve done all you can to be a good person, then look at the culture of the organization. Is it them? 

I once worked with a senior leadership team which was backstabbing and in-fighting all day, every day. They spent so much energy on office politics that productivity and impact suffered. When I raised it with the CEO, his eyes twinkled and he said, “That’s exactly what I want! I want them to fight! Keeps them on their toes.”

He also knew that when his people appeared unstable, he could appear stable in contrast. When he was called on to settle petty disputes between his underlings, he was king.

Once I realized that the culture of the organization was being set by a leader with bad intentions, I knew that there was nothing I could do. Nor could any members of the senior team.

Nor could you, if your office culture is contrary to your values and your ability to grow.

If It Is Them – if there is a culture mismatch between you and where you work – you have a couple of choices.

You might be in a senior enough position to change things – which will take alliances and agreements with other people to buck the culture and create a new way. It’s hard but it can be done.

My clients have done it.

You might have to change yourself – go against your values or drop them all together, in order to stay. This option often feels like the path of least resistance, so plenty of people take it. That is, until they realize they have crushed their soul and hate themselves and really, really, really hate their jobs.

Not kidding.

You might have to leave your organization if you realize that the culture is toxic, it’s not going to change and you’re at risk of turning into someone you really don’t like. But, the good news is there has never been a better time to find a new job. 

Also not kidding.

Finally, after you’ve taken a gander at Is It Me? and Is It Them? you can ask What Do I Really Want?

Which, by the way, is the essential question any of us can ask.

And we’ll talk about that next week.

 

Quit Your Job

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There has never been a better time to quit your job and find a new one.

(I can sense you spluttering from afar.)

(You’re thinking that it’s easy for me to say.)

(You’re thinking I might be certifiably nuts.)

(You’re thinking that I don’t know what it’s reeeeaaaallly like out there, especially for someone who’s young or old or whatever you’ve got going on in your life.)

But I know I’m right about this.

In the county where I used to live, Arlington County in Virginia, unemployment is at 2.2%. That’s a full two percent less than the U.S. average. I’ve talked to hiring people in Arlington and they have open jobs which they cannot fill. Good jobs.

I spoke to a client this past week who’s facing the same issue in Washington, DC. Open positions, no candidates.

Around the U.S., there are a record 6.6 million job openings.

Makes you go “Hmmmmm”, doesn’t it?

Because you’ve been stiff-arming a search for a new job. Sure, it’s crossed your mind. But you think:

  • Job searches are a pain in the butt and take forever
  • No one will hire me because I’m under 30/over 50
  • What if no one wants me?
  • What if I find out my skills aren’t that great?
  • What if I land in a place that’s even more toxic than the place I’m in now?

Shall we knock those down, one at a time?

  • With unfilled jobs across the board, finding a new role is going to be easier than ever
  • People who might have previously been excluded are now included, because jobs must be filled. If you’re qualified, you’ll get a look
  • See “unfilled jobs across the board”
  • If you’ve stayed current with your skills in your current role, you should be OK. If you haven’t, take an online course to brush up your skillset
  • Toxic work place? Let’s drill down on that one

“According to a U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics and Yale University report, 70 percent of all jobs are found through networking. A recent survey by CareerXroads shows that only 15 percent of positions were filled through job boards. The survey showed that most jobs are either filled internally or through referrals.” (Washington Post) If you, then, focus on networking and generating referrals for your new job, you can ask about the work environment and office politics. If your friends (the people who are doing the referring) say the place is gruesomely toxic, you can pass on that opportunity in favor of the kind of workplace where it’s an utter pleasure to work.

Those workplaces exist, by the way.

And, studies have shown that income changes more significantly when you start a new role versus small annual increases at your current job.

So, a better workplace plus more money! What’s not to like?

You might say, “But I love living where I live and there are no jobs like you’re talking about here!”

What I hear you say is more about your priorities than anything else. Where you live is more important than what you do.

Which is totally fine. In fact, it’s awesome.

You know what’s important to you – now, own it. Realize that your job exists to support your life, so if you’re unhappy at your job… you can still get a new one. Maybe you’ll have to consider a different field, a different kind of role, a new use of your skills. As long as you stay in your town (honoring your real priority), you should be fine. Plus, you know, happier.

The Great Recession, which happened ten years ago this week, impacted all of us. We got frightened, and gun shy, and maybe a little bit cowed when it came to work. We remember when a lot of our friends and family found themselves out of a job and had a hard time finding something. Anything.

And so we’ve carried that trauma forward with us in a collective way.

Now is the time to lay down that burden, once and for all.

There are jobs out there. Good jobs. Lots of them.

If you’re not happy where you are, go somewhere else.

And if you’re an employer who’s not doing everything you can to make your workplace a good place to work with good pay for all – get ready. People can leave you in a hot minute these days – and they will if you neglect your greatest asset. Your people.

 

That Time I Learned Something New About Myself

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When I was just getting started in my career, a slightly old friend passed along some advice.

“If anyone important asks you to lunch,” she said, “make sure you order steak tartare and Scotch neat, just to show them how tough you are.”

My nose wrinkled at the thought of raw meat mixed with raw egg yolk and firewater for lunch. It’s highly probable that I responded with, “I dunno. How about a Cobb salad and a Diet Coke?”

Truth is, I’ve never been one to choose something just to make a point. It’s not how I’m wired.

Plus, even at a young age, I had decided that Scotch was not the distilled spirit for me.

I mean, Scotch. Just the sound of it conjures up people with expense account lunches and questionable moral underpinnings. Like club members at a club I wouldn’t want to join. Like your lawyer’s lawyer’s drink of choice.

I wrote off Scotch years ago with the throwaway line, “I am not grown-up enough for Scotch.” Oh, I had tried it, like everyone did. And it smoked, and burned, and made my eyes water, and was highly unpleasant. So deciding I wasn’t a Scotch drinker was easy – I merrily went along my way without the slightest bit of angst that I was missing something by exempting whisky.

Until, that is, I went to Scotland this summer and my mind changed.

Because there in the windswept Orkney Islands, I was finally taught how to drink whisky properly.

Hadn’t realized there was a right and a wrong way to drink liquor until a wise, gruff Viking of a man opened my mind and showed me a thing or two. Turns out I had been doing it wrong.

He taught me that fine single malt whisky needs to be treated the way you’d treat a fine red wine. You drink it warm. In a small, special glass. Maybe add a drop of water to open up the flavors.

I mean, who knew Scotch even had flavors?

You sip it. You let the flavors settle in. You appreciate the long finish.

You enjoy, in a slow and reasoned way.

And guess what? The whisky I drank became a pleasure.

The thing I thought I was not grown-up enough for became something I was excited to learn more about.

All I needed was to be taught by someone with deep knowledge.

Funny, huh?

Now that I’m home, I find my mind turning to other areas of my life where this might also be true. What could I possibly come to enjoy if I were just taught by the right person?

It’s a great question, isn’t it? And perhaps one you can ask yourself today, too.

Because the world is a big place, just packed with interesting things to learn and do. And, asking to be taught a thing or two by someone with deep knowledge isn’t a sign of weakness – maybe it’s your passport to new adventures.