It fairly radiates from some people, doesn’t it? You can see it in their eyes. In the way they hold their shoulders. They have a crushing belief that they’re not good enough. Never will be good enough. Couldn’t possibly be good enough.
Since they’re always going to be a little bit short, they work like maniacs. Putting in killer hours and slaving away to make sure every “i” is dotted and every “t” is crossed – sometimes spending hours and hours checking and re-checking their dotting and crossing.
Because if they make a mistake – even one tiny, infinitesimal error – then the whole jig is up and everyone in the world will know what they themselves believe: I am not good enough.
But we can already see it – they’re telegraphing with every step they take. Like people pretending that the bad toupee is real hair. We all know, don’t we?
Perhaps this is the heart of perfectionism. The relentless chase to prove the unprovable – to prove one’s basic worth.
I say it’s unprovable, because I truly don’t believe the premise.
Because in Michele World, there’s no such thing as “not good enough”.
Every person has worth, because every person is here.
And whatever you do is good enough because it’s what you did. If the result was less than happy, then try again.
That’s all you have to do.
When you free yourself from the heavy rock of not being good enough, guess what happens? Things get pretty good. When you’re not fixated on making mistakes, you make less of them. When you know, rather than doubt, that you have skills, strengths, resources and resilience – why then, you can call on them at will. You succeed. You thrive. You soar.
I love those stories where an unsuspecting person discovers superhuman powers and then uses them to do heroic service. Think Harry Potter: living in a cupboard under the stairs, wearing cast-off clothes, suffering, until he finds out that he’s not only a wizard, but The Wizard, foretold in a prophecy. He goes on to defeat evil and restore order in the world.
So, too, Luke Skywalker. All Luke wants to do is leave the arid, desolate moisture farm run by his Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru and have some fun with his friends over in Tosche Station. Circumstances prevail and he discovers his birthright as a Jedi Knight and ultimately defeats evil and restores order in the world.
And I’d be remiss if I forgot to mention Claire Bennet in the TV show “Heroes”. Claire’s a typical teenager, a cheerleader who finds out she has the ability to spontaneously regenerate – she cannot die – and goes on to defeat evil and restore order in the world.
See the pattern? Normal, everyday people discover something amazing about themselves and what they’re capable of doing. And go on to create something really good in the world.
I know what you’re thinking – “I don’t have any special ability – I’m not good enough to have any.”
Once again, I am going to disagree.
You have special gifts. You do. You just can’t see them. Maybe you’ve disowned them.
Maybe they make you uncomfortable.
But when you embrace them, when you own what’s really best about you – you will know, once and for all, that you are indeed good enough.
Doesn’t matter what happened in your last job. Or the one before that. Or what happened in your marriage. Or how your kids turned out. Or that your mother died. Or how much you weigh. Doesn’t matter, doesn’t matter, doesn’t matter.
Align yourself with your gifts.
And defeat evil. Restore order to your world.
Be the hero you were born to be.
It’s all that matters.