My daughter teaches me so much.
A senior in high school, she’s recently been working on a one-person show for her Theatre IV final. As she writes the script and perfects her performance, she often needs to talk through the process. “Mom,” she said one evening, “my piece really needs to make a statement.”
I thought about that.
A declarative avowal. A point of view.
It’s a rare thing these days, even amidst all the bloviating on talk radio and cable TV. It seems to me that so many of us work very hard to not make a statement at all. We’d do anything but have a distinct point of view.
Maybe it feels judgy to have a hard-and-fast opinion, especially for those of us who value harmony and belongingness most of all.
We don’t want to say anything that might trigger a feeling of separateness.
So we equivocate, and use our lips to form mewling, mealy-mouthed words that never really say what needs to be said.
Then wonder why no one really understands us.
We fail to make a real statement about who we are and what’s important to us. We never let anyone know who we are and what we think.
If that’s what we brought to our own one-person show, we’d surely stink.
I couldn’t let go of this idea of “making a statement”. I began to question myself – where am I hedging a little? Where am I keeping safe by not having a point of view?
Fair enough to say that I rarely hedge… but there are definitely times when I smile and say nothing. Even when I disagree. Every time I do this, I feel smaller and smaller.
So today’s a good day for me to stop.
It’s time to consciously make a statement.
I’m going to set my intention at the start – who do I want to be? What do I want to say?
And then I’m going to say it.
In conversations, in coaching sessions, in blog posts, in my own self-talk. I’m going to say what I need to say. Not to hurt anyone or cause pain – I never want to hold that intention.
But in a way to express myself, and let myself be known.
No more swallowing words, or going along to get along.
A statement. A point of view. An opinion.
That’s what I’m going to bring to the production that is this life of mine. I am going to let the curtain rise so you can see even more of who I really am.
And I will absolutely, 100% support you doing the exact same thing.
That’s what’s going to make this so damn much fun.